Archive for the ‘ neurosis ’ Category

Dotting the Is and Crossing the Ts… or is it the Other Way Around?

As a sometimes-very-anal-retentive person when it comes to getting the details down, one of the things that I do to most annoy myself is to catch myself making stupid, tiny mistakes. For example, I was working on a proposal to an organization today and before I sent it in, I said “wait, better double-check the name.” Which I did, and then quickly capitalized all the “The’s” preceding the organization’s name. Sadly, my moment of anal-inspired editing stabbed me in the back when I learned after the fact that the site I used as a reference actually had the name wrong and I had been right in the first place. There goes my professional cred.

Now, I know this isn’t near the end of the world, and most people–myself included–have much bigger things to worry about. But it takes me so long to get inside of something I’m working on, whether professionally or creatively, that I have trouble letting it go once I’m into it. These things become more personal than they should, somehow a reflection on me. I become convinced sometimes that no one will appreciate the depth and detail of the proposal with an extra capital T, or the home-spun scarf with the slightly uneven finish, or the chocolate chip cookies just a tad too crisp on the edges.

Then comes the “just breathe” moment I’m having now. Realizing as I write this I’ve missed yoga for two weeks. Those classes emphasize not being perfect, but instead doing the best you can with the body you have, challenging yourself to do better, and laughing when you fall. I’m going to work on taking that approach outside of class more often.

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